Glamnetic Lashes

“I like big lashes, and I cannot lie.”

-Ruth Lee

Hi, babes!

If there is one thing that I know to be true, it is that “naturally gorgeous eyelashes” were truly never in the cards for me.

Thankfully, I have come to terms with this heart-rending reality for at least the past decade.

In the past ten years, I have combated nearly every single variety of eyelash enhancement- glue on strips, semi-permanent clusters, lash extensions, etc. If it was manufactured post-2010, there is a high possibility that I attempted to adhere it to my eyelashes.

That being said, it may come as a shock that I was profoundly late to the “Magnetic Lash” game.

To be honest, I had found myself in a very comfortable routine with glue-on lashes, and the idea of starting something new again seemed perilous.

Nonetheless, it eventually became impossible to ignore this new craze that was sweeping my social media pages.

After some novice detective work on Instagram, I felt confident that Glamnetic Lashes were the ones I first wanted to get my hands on.

*For the sake of being completely transparent, I have placed two orders thus far with my own finances to purchase Glamnetic Lashes. Additionally, Glamnetic’s PR Team contacted me to collaborate on this Blog Post with them. The lashes featured in this post were compensated, however the opinions in this post are 100% my own.*

Glamnetic #SquadGoals

Part of the appeal of Glametic Lashes, is that you have the ability to choose between Mink or Synthetic Lashes.

They also feature different types of Eyeliner (Don’t stress, I’ll share the details later on in this post).

The Lashes currently vary in price from 27.99-37.99 a pair, and the liner varies from 37.99-42.99.

If you are looking to save some some $$, you can invest in one of their beautifull curated ‘Value Kits’ and don’t be afraid to look online for a discount code to apply at checkout.

Oh, hello gorgeous packaging!

Glamnetic has INCREDIBLE “How-to” Instructions online, so I will spare you the details. Click Over Here >

Essentially, the idea is to apply the liner as you typically would- close up to your lash line and as thick as the band on the lashes.

As I mentioned earlier, Glamnetic has both a liquid magnetic liner as well as a felt tip liner.

Glamnetic’s Liquid Liner
Glamnetic’s Felt Tip Liner

Having both in my cosmetic artillery at the time, I have a preference of using the Felt Tip Liner to draw a small wing, and then adding a light coat of the Liquid Liner near my lash line. This combination allows me the precision of the Felt Tip, with the added “grip” of the liquid liner.

One concern I faced when initially practicing with magentic lashes, was the fear of the outter corners of the lash lifting. This is common even with glue-on strips, and I was curious how Glamnetic would prevent this…

Cue Glamnetic’s Lash Anchors!

Once your liner has dried for 20-60 seconds, and you have placed the lash band on top of the liner, you can then utilize a single anchor to “sandwich” your natural lash between said anchor and the magnetic strip lash. Doing this on either side of the strip lash will increase the overall staying power of your magnetic lash, as well as obliterating the risk of a lift-off malfunction.

TIP: Use a metal pair of tweezers to easily grip the anchor

At the time this Blog will be posted, I have tried 6 different styles of Glamnetic Lashes- 4 Mink and 2 Synthetic.

As a self-proclaimed “Lash-Snob”, I am entirely obsessed with Glamnetic Lashes.

I will admit that, just like anything in the Beauty Industry, I became much more comfortable and confident in the application process with experience. If you are brand new to this style of application, I would recommend viewing some You-Tube reviews as well as practicing at-home before jumping to wear them out on the town.

Once the application became familiar, I have complete confidence that these babies aren’t BUDGING once I apply them. I have relatively sensitive eyes, and these lashes/liner do not irritate my eyes even after several hours of wear. I love that I can switch up any make-up look INSTANTLY with these lashes.

You can grab yours at

Let me know your thoughts- would you try Magnetic Lashes?




Life Update + Presley

I haven’t blogged in 880 days.

Did it take an international pandemic and subsequent quarantine to draw me back to the keyboard? Perhaps.

However, I am here. We are here.

Let’s catch up.

I wish that I could make some profound statement as to excuse my absence.

I didn’t backpack through Europe or finally finish my elusive Degree. My priorities shifted, and in an almost theraputic sense, I nonchalantly distanced myself from most of my prior “Social Media Obligations”. You see, when I first created The Ruth Lee Diary, I was truly infatuated with every nook and cranny within blogging, creating content- and dare I say the *unmentionable* “influencing”.

And before you know it, a month without blogging turned into a year. And one day I woke up and said, “I should really blog again.” But then that day turned into night (as most days do) and my domain continued to lay dormant. One more year passed, and suddenly, there is a tiny flame of inspiration once more- although it is in great need of kindling.

And to be honest, maybe the reason I am back is much simpler than the days of needing to share my story with the world.

Maybe the real reason I am back, is to share my story with myself.

Regardless, Let’s light this flame.

Presley Autumn

Last time I posted on here, Presley had not even turned one yet. Today, she is a three-nager.

Here is a peek into the past for you:

Processed with VSCO with f2 preset
November 2017

My sweet, little, chunky Presley babe.

I hate to play this over-used familiar tune, as cliche as it is, but it truly is so obscene how quickly the time does fly.

How on Earth can I summarize her existence of the past two years in a few paragraphs…

I miss these early days we shared- in some ways. It is quite the life upgrade to have a child who can use the potty by themselves (most days), though I sure do miss those baby snuggles.

I distinctively remember struggling with a bulky, infant car seat on a long walk from our car into the gym one day years ago, and I turned to my husband and said, “I cannot wait until the day that she can walk next to us!”

Well Ruth, that day is here. And guess what?

… I mean, yes- It is pretty convenient.

But you will look at pictures of your baby from times previous, and cry.

Presley has progressed from a drooly, crawling infant into the most loving, bright, imaginitive little girl.

Processed with VSCO with f2 preset
April 2020

Do you remember in Kindergarten, when you created something you were truly proud of for the first time? When you finally were entrusted with a glue stick and some dry macaroni noodles, or maybe even water colors and a paintbrush for the first time? And after all of your hard work, you have created the most magestic piece of art you have ever seen?! Something that went on the refrigerator door for all to behold, and everytime you glanced at it you thought, “Wow, I made that. I really made that.

I guess, in an odd way, that is the best way I can describe the last two years with Pres.

Don’t get me wrong; I very *very* clearly remember pregnancy and child labor with this child.

However, at the same time, I still cannot believe that something so beautiful and truly (wholesomely) lovely came from me.

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

I remember rolling around my small town when I was pregnant with her, and the conversation of “What do you think she will look/be like” was often a topic of discussion.

I would always tell people, “I cannot create an image of who she will be in my head- I just cannot picture her!”


I have since concluded that the reason this occured, the reason that I never could even pretend to imagine who the little soul I was carrying around, is truly because she was and is so much more than my “brain before her” could have come up with.


I see a lot of my husband, Dakota shining through the unique person that Presley is becoming.

I am so grateful for this.

They are truly two peas in a pod. Due to the nature of her birth, Dakota was the first one to truly get to be with her after she was born. Some of my first, real memories of her are seeing Dakota hold her on the couch next to my hospital bed.

The first picture I ever took of Presley

They are both *painfully* stubborn. They are also both extraordinarily charming enough that somehow this can be overlooked.

They are both midly picky-eaters, however neither will say no to macaroni and cheese or ice cream.

They both will serenade you shamelessly with their current favorite song, although I would bet money on the fact that at least 45% of the words will be wrong. (And I am not a betting woman!)

Presley has a very, special love for her dad. She will let him sleep in if I am gone (please note, that she does not extend this courtesy to yours truly). She loves to go for drives in “Daddy’s Jeep”, regardless of the destination. Her daddy can make her smile bigger than anyone.

If you are a personal friend or a very long-time follower, you will know that my journey to a husband and a child was not an impeccable and unblemished path. Although that may be a tale for a different time, I will acknowledge the gratitude in my rehabilitated heart for every moment that I have lived to get to the “present-tense” of my life.IMG_7928

Now, all that being said- if you are here on my page you clearly are aware that this blog is not for the naive or faint of heart.

I am resuscitating this Blog in hopes to be very honest and authentic in the future posts I share with you.

There simply is not sunshine every single day, and that is OK.

While I am a sucker for an aesthetic website lay out, or VSCO’ed photograph, I plan on continuing to shed light on imperfect and complicated topics such as mental health, body image, marriage, motherhood, and more.

This is The Ruth Lee Diary 2020.

Welcome back.



The Hope Pregnancy Drive




Hey, friends!

Oh my goodness, we are approaching (in my opinion) THE BEST time of the year!

We have Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years right on our toes!

It’s a beautiful season; one where we find peace, joy and celebration- and maybe an extra helping of mashed potatoes!

If you know me, and know my story, then you might know that this time last year I was preparing for the birth of my daughter.

You might also know my background. In March of 2016 I was a working (paycheck to paycheck), un-married, college student with big news- I was PREGNANT.

Now, statistically speaking, that’s quite a predicament. However, I was one of the lucky ones. I ended up marrying the father of my child. I was able to work my entire pregnancy. We had AMAZING support from both of our families. My daughter was born into a loving home, with everything that she needed.


However, this is not the case for many sweet babies who are welcomed into the world each year. This really hits home for me and I had been seeking out a way that I could channel my gratitude into helping others.

Even though we no longer live there, Saint George, Utah is where I attended University. It is where I met and later married Dakota. It is where my daughter was born.  I spent the majority of the past seven years there, and almost all of my adult life. So this year, I wanted to be able to give back to that community.

Enter, The Hope Pregnancy Center.

The Hope Pregnancy Center is an amazing resource that provides a wide variety of services, from Adoption Information and Referrals, Parenting Education, Ultrasound Referrals, Pregnancy Tests, Infant & Maternity supplies and SO, so much more!

I have been working with the Client Services Director, and found out that this year they have about 40 moms/moms-to-be who are in their system and using their services. These mommas and babies are in need.


This is what is needed for the babies!

  • Diapers (She said specifically NEWBORN and larger sizes- 3,4,5.)
  • Bottles
  • Baby Wash & Shampoo
  • Breastfeeding Supplies
  • Rash Cream
  • Baby Clothes (preemie to 24 months) THESE CAN BE USED if in great condition!

Also needed for the Moms

  • Toothpaste
  • Shampoo
  • Conditioner
  • Body Wash
  • Soap
  • Maternity Clothes (Again, can be used!)

And because it is the Holidays, I want to go a little bit extra! 😉

I would also like to get donations of:

  • Baby Toys
  • Baby Books
  • Gifts for the Mom’s

I really want to get some nice gifts put together for the Momma’s! I remember how tight money was during my pregnancy (OK, it still is!) and how difficult it was to spend money on anything beyond NEEDS. So, I would really like to get some pretty and lovely items for the Mom’s, to show them some love and some Holiday Magic! ❤


If you live in Northern Utah, I would be happy to meet up/pick up any items you would be willing to donate!

If you are in Southern Utah, I will be traveling down in a few weeks and can pick up then!

If you are out of state, you are welcome to either purchase items on Amazon or another online retailer and ship them to me! (Message me for address!)

Or, of course, if you are unable to physically donate anything, I would encourage you to visit our GoFund Me. Even $1 and $5 donations can add up and make a huge difference.

We would ideally like to get everything over to the Hope Center by the end of this month!

If you have ANY questions or comments or ideas to help, E-MAIL ME!


THANK YOU GUYS so, so much in advance! I am so excited about this and I know together we can make a huge difference!





How I Get Free $#!*

Before I begin this post, I would like to give a shout-out to my mother.
She instilled a drive very early on in me to bargain-hunt. Luckily (or unluckily) for me, I was also taught as a young kid that if I wanted anything outside of food and shelter, I had to buy it myself.
So, really, I learned the true value of a dollar pretty early on. Which in turn led to me finding ways to stretch that dollar as far as I could.
Today, as a blogger, influencer, and overall cheapskate, I am so fortunate to have figured out a few really awesome ways/sources to get free $#!*.
I think it’s funny when people figure something awesome out, only to keep it all to themselves. I am not one of those people! I love sharing my life hacks with you all! SO without further ado, here’s what the other bloggers aren’t sharing with you!



If you’re an active Social Media user that has over 120 Instagram or Facebook friends, then you can become a LocalFluence Influencer & get FREE things like: color & cuts, restaurant meals, lawn care, dental work & many other free things. Through LocalFluence  I have received a lot of free meals, gift cards, and services! (Think Costa Vida, Texas Roadhouse, shopping, waxing, etc.!)

Right now they are active in ALL of Utah (Southern and Northern!) And I also believe they are expanding to Phoenix and Denver as well!

Basically, how it works, is they will release a new list of “offers” every month. You can go through the list and let them know what offers you are interested in! Then, LocalFluence will e-mail or text you if you are chosen for an offer!

If you are chosen, all you have to do is create a natural post on Instagram about your experience. It’s super easy and who doesn’t love a free lunch! The best part is, I have seen that the amount of followers you have doesn’t play into if you get chosen or not. They are really fair about how they distribute, and it gives everyone a pretty even playing field to get some free stuff!



Along similar lines, Influenster is a super innovative and unique source to not only give honest reviews and ask questions about products, but also become eligible to test out new products for free!

How it works: Create an account and begin to review products that you already have used! Honesty is totally key here, so you are 100% allowed to bash that product you wish you never bought! Once you are active and have linked your social media accounts to Influenster, you become eligible to receive “VoxBoxes”. Major companies work with Influenster to get the word out about their products!

I have received free Marc Jacobs make-up, Laura Mercier make-up, Kat Von D perfume, skincare products from Loreal, and MUCH more.

It’s super fun, super easy, and totally free! Once you have received a VoxBox, you will work on the app to get a “badge”. Basically it gives you little assignments like posting on Facebook about the product, reviewing it online, etc. Super basic things, and totally worth free product, if you ask me. Oh, and you don’t have to BS a review. If you actually hate it,they want to know!



Octoly is essentially the greatest platform on Earth. However, this one does have pretty hefty up-front requirements. I believe you have to have 10k followers on Instagram to apply! BUT, if you do, you NEEEEED to be on Octoly.

Again, this is going to be a product in exchange for an Instagram (or YouTube) review post. However, they have a really unique and easy-to-use App. Essentially, they have a Free Store, and you get to view and apply for the products that you want! They work with incredible brands such as Becca, Dior, MAC, Yves Saint Laurent, Lancome, Urban Decay… Ok, you get it. The brand reps will check you out, and either approve or reject you to receive that product. If you are approved, it gets shipped right to your doorstep and you have to create a review post about it!

I first joined this company in February of 2017 and they have just EXPLODED with their reach and the brands they work with in the past several months! It has been incredible to be a part of. It’s an amazing and very well organized company and I CANNOT recommend it enough!



Collabor8 is an app that connects brands to influencers, and was actually founded by two Utah entrepreneurs. As an influencer, it is really nice to be able to explore TONS of companies that want to and are excited about working with you!

It’s well-organized, and you can search brands through genre, location, amount of followers, and more! I haven’t spent too much time on it since downloading it a few months ago, but it has already landed me a handful of successful collaborations! So I highly recommend it to anyone beginning to dabble into collaborations. Find it in your App Store!



Collaborations are a huge part of what I do, and if blogging or influencing is something you are interested in, you HAVE to know how to do it! I am really fortunate now, because I have a lot of reps seeking ME out in regards to this- however in the beginning, I spent a lot of time researching and finding companies to work with.

Basically, I would find a company that I vibe’d with. I would then send them out a thoughtful and personalized e-mail in regards to why they should collab with me. Essentially, what this means is that they would send me free product/clothing and I would promote them on my blog/Instagram in return.

It’s a simple and very effective exchange, and I am sure you see it all over Social Media! If you get pretty good at it, and have a significant following, you can eventually get to a point where the company will pay you to post, on top of receiving free product!

I will create a post going into much more detail later on about this (including how to create a media kit), as I have learned A TON about how to get a good response from companies, and even get free travel! So, stay tuned! ❤

I know that with more experience and more time, this list will grow! However, it has taken me a lot of time and research to have learned what I have already! So, I hope that this list helps those of you who are interested, and may be able to save some of you some time! ❤
As always, let me know if you have any questions or would like more information about these! (Or feel free to fill me in on what I am missing!)
I am really considering creating some detailed posts in how I got started becoming a real “blogger” and giving out tips in regards to my journey! Let me know if that’s something you would be interested in!





Boudoir After Baby: Channeling the “sexy” through the spit-up

I’ll be honest.

It’s not an easy task to maintain ANY level of sexy when the majority of your days involve no sleep, diaper changes, baby vomit, and the same pair of sweatpants.


I remember being so hopeful in regards to my postpartum sex-appeal while I was still pregnant. (lol) It made sense for me, though. My pregnancy had its fair share of challenges and strife, as most pregnancies do. However, I did have a fond love of my pregnant body and felt beautiful (up until the last few weeks…).

I mean, don’t get me wrong, I knew it would be bad. But being left with a deflated belly, an unexpected cesarean scar, stretch marks, and bad acne- almost overnight- was a lot harder to deal with once it was right in front of me. Add in the sole responsibility of a new, tiny human, a sprinkle of sheer exhaustion, subtract any showers or personal hygiene, and a super-size pack of adult diapers, and that- THAT was the reality of my post-baby self

.// <ins class=”adsbygoogle” style=”display:block” data-ad-format=”fluid” data-ad-layout-key=”-8j+1w-dq+e9+ft” data-ad-client=”ca-pub-4800724376998595″ data-ad-slot=”1257359825″></ins> (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

It’s crazy for me to think about now. I remember feeling so much pressure to act like I had my s&$% together after giving birth. I bought spanx for the first time. I would layer them over my belly band and squeeze into my post-baby jeans. I literally was still recovering from surgery, could barely walk, was STILL wearing diapers, AND I WAS WORRIED ABOUT MY APPEARANCE. *face palm* If I could get a time-machine purely to slap my self at this time, I would.

It’s OK to be easy on yourself and let yourself recover from childbirth. I think we forget that, and that is silly. Whether you pushed that watermelon of a baby out, or had your abdomen sliced into to retrieve it-

please realize, that if anyone deserves a break or downtime, IT’S YOU.

So, Mommas, be kind to yourself. Wear your husband’s baggy sweatshirts with pride. And when you are ready to summon your inner-goddess again, come back and read this.

It’s true, that being a mother means sacrifice. But, you shouldn’t sacrifice ALL of you. This is one of the hard lessons that I learned.

We are taught that we are “bad” moms if we allow our selves any personal pleasures. Hobbies, talents, and even careers are pushed aside when we pull the mom jeans on. We feel guilty when use any of our time on ourselves… which, after time, can result in running ourselves into the dirt.

Ladies, I’m here to tell you, it’s OK to take time for yourself. It’s OK to regain your confidence after having a baby. It’s OK to feel sexy again.


Your children need a happy, confident, and positive role model.

If that means putting on makeup during your baby’s nap time- then that’s OK.

If that means being a working mom and providing for your family- that’s OK.

If that means going to the gym and taking your child to the daycare- THAT’S OK.

(Are you catching on?)

Before I had my daughter I had dipped my toes into the “modeling” industry. I was no stranger to bikini and boudoir shoots.

But after I had my daughter, that really didn’t seem like an option to me anymore. I wasn’t happy with my body and I felt uncomfortable with the idea. Which, truthfully, saddened me. Photography, beauty, cameras, make-up… If you know me, you know that these are things I loved. So, would I really need to give this all up now because I am a Mom?

I met Mackenzie Kessler by chance, when someone tagged me in her Facebook post looking for a couple to photograph in Saint George. Accepting that bridal shoot was one of the first steps I took into regaining a bit of the “old” me. After months of struggle, anxiety, self-doubt, and depression, confidence I hadn’t felt in a long time came back. It was nice.

We created a friendship and I later learned that she also specialized in Boudoir Photography. I remember thinking, “Oh that’s cool. I have several friends that I could send her way for that.”

And a few weeks later, it hit me…

Why not me?

SO, eight months after I had my baby, I did a boudoir shoot.

And this is what happened…

(Warning: BOUDOIR PICTURES BELOW. If you don’t want to see them… don’t look.)










Presley’s Birthday and the stretchies she gave me. ❤

One of my biggest motivations in following through this shoot was to love and celebrate my new “mom bod”, so I asked Mackenzie to keep all my stretch marks and keep my body “as-is”- meaning no crazy photo shop. Which, she gladly obliged.

When she sent me the pictures, I almost cried- for real. After so many times of being sad at my reflection, I had these pretty images to love. I turned these- and more (not all of the pictures I am sharing with you!) into a beautiful book for my husband. (I never got to give him one before our wedding). After all we had survived together the past year, it was a small and pretty token that we had walked out of it all with.

I loved these images and how Mackenzie made the process so painless and FUN, that I wanted to share more about her with you- and the idea of a boudoir shoot.

Mackenzie Kessler

Share a little bit about YOU. Who you are, and how you got started into boudoir photography. What is your favorite part of being a photographer?

My name is Mackenzie Kessler and I specialize in boudoir and wedding photography. I will start by saying that I have always loved taking photos of family and friends. I seriously have 19 photo albums between junior high and high school but I never dreamed that I would turn that passion into a business. 

I started my business after trying to find a boudoir photographer for myself. I wanted to give a boudoir book to my husband as a wedding gift. After doing some research on boudoir photographers in my area, they were way out of my price range. I thought, “I shouldn’t have to pay thousands of dollars just to get some sexy pictures of myself.”

So I grabbed my camera, a willing friend, some cute outfits and away we went. I changed all the settings on the camera, put myself into a pose and told her to point and shoot. The images were awesome! Quickly after, she wanted a boudoir shoot, then her coworkers and next thing I know, I started a Facebook page with some of the photos. Overnight, I had inquires about my pricing and where my studio was. 

I jumped into action and Bashful Boudoir Photography was born! Right away, I knew that I wanted it to be affordable for EVERYONE to do a shoot. So, I have a variety of packages starting at $400.

It’s a crazy time we live in today’s world. There are insane pressures from social media to look a certain way. As a Boudoir Photographer, someone who sees REAL women’s bodies on a consistent basis, what do you have to say about what is portrayed in the media? Do you feel pressured to edit your pictures a certain way or to change the way your clients look?

Social media is a beast and it’s not real life! It’s so visual and everyone is trying to compete. Magazines, T.V. shows and celebrities are always pushing the “ideal body”. I’ll say it once and I’ll say it again, that’s NOT how real women look. Photoshop is such a powerful tool and I personally feel that it’s used incorrectly.
Yes, I use Photoshop and Lightroom for my editing. I remove blemishes, bruises, scars and even out the skin tones. However, I refuse to “take a few pounds off” or “make your waist smaller.” That is not who you are and I believe so strongly in feeling powerful, sexy and confident in the body you’re already rockin!

I think it’s become fairly normal to book a boudoir shoot for someone before getting married… however, when else do your clients come to you to book a shoot?

I think you would be surprised at the mix of clients I get.

Yes, I get the clients who want to do a shoot as a wedding gift but there are so many other reasons as to why my clients do a boudoir shoot.  You can do a shoot for an anniversary, birthday gift, Valentines Day or Christmas gift, or maybe you just got that revenge bod and want to have the photos for your self. I have had a few women who are young, single and just want to look and feel beautiful for the day! Really, there are NO guidelines for having a reason to do a boudoir shoot.

We did our boudoir shoot when I was about eight months postpartum… Do you see a lot of new moms booking with you? If you don’t- why do you think that is? What would you want to tell a new mom who was “afraid” of getting in front of the camera after having a baby?

I have had a handful of new moms come for a shoot but I wish I saw more. After talking with friends and clients who are new moms, what I hear most is “my body doesn’t look like it used to and I don’t feel sexy.”  Well hello, you just created a beautiful human and that’s something to celebrate!!
I think that most new mommas are worried about the few extra pounds they gained, stretch marks and even scars.
Listen, getting in front of a camera in your skivvies is pretty uncomfortable for a lot of people. However, I have done hours and hours of research on posing every body type so that it looks amazing. I do a phone consultation with all of my clients and we talk about trouble areas and what outfits you can wear to draw attention away from those spots.
If you decide to do a boudoir shoot, please trust your photographer! I can’t stress this enough. If you don’t feel good vibes during that phone consultation, don’t book with them. You must be able to trust that they will make you look and feel like a million bucks.  You deserve it!

If you want to learn more about Mackenzie and stay up with her photography, follow her Instagram Pages here and here.

I think women celebrating their bodies and feeling beautiful are amazing things! Who’s with me?


Ruth Lee

How I Planned My Entire Wedding in 17 Days

As we are approaching our one year anniversary next month, I have had a decent amount of time to process and ponder our special day!

I have also had an alarming amount of questions as to how I pulled it off.

Because, yes,

I planned our entire wedding in SEVENTEEN DAYS.

(As a side note, I was also in my third-trimester of pregnancy. Yeah. Let that sink in a little bit!)


So, let’s start out at the beginning.

I have known for a long, long time that Dakota and I would end up getting married! On our first date, we both talked about how important our families were. As our relationship grew, I knew that we both wanted marriage in the future. People might not know this, but about five months before we found out I was pregnant, Dakota took me up on a mountain and confessed his devotion and commitment to me, and that one day he would marry me.

So, even with the pressures of a pregnancy and then moving into a new home together, I was never really stressed about us getting married. I knew it would happen, and that we loved each other. I wanted Dakota to ask me when he wanted to. I see girls in relationships constantly drilling their significant others about a proposal and a ring… and that just wasn’t my style. We were happy. I knew we would one day get married. And I was content with waiting until whenever that was!


It was worth the wait, because on September 4th, 2016 Dakota planned a beautiful proposal in the state where we both were born- Arizona. It was honestly right out of a fairytale. I’ll never forget how genuine, sweet, and thought-out it was.


We talked about when we wanted to get married, and we settled on October of 2017. I mean, I would have enough time to “plan”, right? Certainly I would have to wait until I got my “body back” after baby, too.


The morning of the day he proposed! I had no idea it was coming! ❤

Well, four days later, on September 8th, we reached an insane decision. Why not get married in 17 days? And not just get married, but actually have a wedding!

(I will let the record show that I tried to convince Dakota in eloping! He was not for it, and wanted a wedding where all our family could attend!)

We made the decision to get married so soon for a few reasons.

After thinking about it, we realized it would mean a lot to us to be able to bring our daughter into the world as one family unit. I wanted to share the same last name with my baby and my husband. Oh, yeah, and I wanted to be able to curse at my HUSBAND on delivery day! (ha ha) We also realized that planning a wedding AFTER we had our baby, would be very difficult- and today, I am SO grateful I realized that! It was also essentially the end of an era- the end of just us TWO. And what a way to end it then with a wedding!

Ah, bless our young, romantic hearts.


Before I get into the nitty-gritty, I want to heed with a warning. When planning a wedding so quickly, there are obviously going to be some sacrifices you will have to make.

My whole life, I dreamed of a bridal shower- as odd as that sounds. I remember going to bridal showers for relatives and family friends, even as a young child. It was such a fun, beautiful memory. A woman before her big day- being honored and celebrated. Gifts JUST for her. And not regular gifts like socks or books- no, beautiful lacy, pretty gifts. Money. “Wife” Gifts. It was just such a fun, up-beat atmosphere. (and later working in the lingerie retail industry for two years, I had developed a love of all things lacy and pretty!) So, as unusual and petty as it may sound, growing up, I looked forward to a bridal shower almost as much as I looked forward to my future wedding!

With our time and circumstances, I never had one.

We also didn’t have

Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties,

a Wedding Registry,

or even a real honeymoon. (Dakota later expressed to me that growing up he always looked forward to “The Big Send Off” and anticipated, adventurous honeymoon with his new wife.)

So, yes, you will make sacrifices and you very well might end up with a wedding that will differ from the one you grew up dreaming about. But, again, we knew that, and we chose that. And the wedding we ended up with, was perfect for us! I don’t mention these details to be negative, simply to be realistic. You will need to prioritize, because honestly, you won’t be able to do EVERYthing.

Ashley Meagan Photography

SO…. How did I do it?

17 days is already a short amount of time, but while I was doing this I was also STILL working two jobs. I think I looked it over and only had two full days off during this time period! HAHA! YIKES. I remember in between phone calls at the office, I had about 47 tabs open on my computer with wedding planning taking place. I utilized every waking second that I had.

Another obstacle we faced was budget. I didn’t have endless funds, so on top of rushing things, I also had to manage to DIY a lot as well.

I Did My Own Wedding Flowers!


I researched a few online stores, and ended up going with Fifty Flowers. Fifty Flowers is an online wholesale flower shop.

I will add, that I have NEVER, ever, in the history of EVER done anything like this before!


But, I was able to find a lot of useful tips and tricks on their website, as well as finding additional blogs and of course, Pinterest. I spent a total of $370.45 for my wedding flowers- centerpieces, bouquets, boutonnieres! Which, is INCREDIBLE! (By the way, if you are ordering ANYTHING online, EVER, always google coupon codes before you submit! This is one of my life lessons!) Also, I put my order in about ten days before our wedding, and they were delivered 2 days before the wedding! So it is very possible to do in a rush!

I did keep my flowers to a minimum- they were certainly not the focus of my wedding. But, they were beautiful, and I don’t regret my choice one bit!


The trick with bulk, online flowers, is that they will deliver them to you before they have fully bloomed. Then, you get to steep them in water 1-2 days, and THEN trim and arrange them.

(TIP- You will end up plucking wilted petals away from the buds, a job a florist typically does, but I kept all the petals and ended up using them for the Flower Girls to toss!)

I did end up finishing the bouquets THE NIGHT before the wedding, with a lot of amazing help from my bridal crew! So, helping hands is a huge plus!


PS- Spray Paint & Mason Jars were my best friends!

Luckily, my husband was a team-player!

I Kept It Personal


It was really important to me to have some personal details in our wedding! The board in the above picture was actually another “DIY” that Dakota and I did.

We went to Home Depot, cut and stained the wood, and then went to a Vinyl Store in our mall and customized it! It turned out so pretty and is something I plan on keeping for a long time!

I also took full advantage of the talented shops at Etsy and had some cute gifts made for our guests. IMG_1747

When using Etsy on a time-crunch, I highly recommend reaching out to the shop before you order! Let them know the date you NEED the items by, and find out if they will be able to accommodate that. With some purchases, I did need to pay for ‘Rush Processing”, but it was worth it to get these last-minute touches!


This is YOUR wedding, and even rushed, it is and should be personal to you and your S/O.

I Got Married On A Sunday Morning


Ok, this is pretty self-explanatory, but I learned a lot in doing this!

If you want your wedding to be held at a Venue, and you don’t have a lot of time, consider doing yours on a Sunday! Not only will the availability be greater and sooner, most likely it will also be a lot more affordable. Our Venue Planner showed us the price difference after we had already decided on a Sunday, and WOW!

Also, you’re still having your wedding on a weekend, so out-of-town guests will have a good chance of being able to come- even on short notice.


I Stayed Organized


I cannot express my gratitude enough for the FREE tools I used to keep everything on track.

Mainly, I used the Budgeter and Checklist tools from The Knot.

I couldn’t have pulled it off with these! Since I was my own wedding planner, I had to keep everything on track and on budget by myself! Even if you have all the time in the world, I would recommend using this site or one similar to it.

I Used Local, Small Resources


I overheard a co-worker mention that she had a small hobby of making cakes, and I jumped on it.

“What are you doing next Sunday?”

No Joke! Keep your ears open! I get that the wedding cake may be really important to some couples, but it was not important enough to Dakota and I to shell out a month’s rent on one. I had a really simple design to begin with, which of course helped. We saved a TON by finding someone to make ours versus finding a wedding bakery to make ours! Also, big-time wedding resources might be less flexible on time restraints.

And, the internet can be an incredible resource! I utilized local Facebook Yardsale and Wedding Pages. You cannot believe the amount of people that have leftover wedding decor and are willing to part with it for pennies on the dollar!

You may also get wildly lucky like me, and have someone let you borrow their Wedding Arch for free! (Shout out to Chelsie!)


I Didn’t Forget What A Wedding is All About


So, if you haven’t had your own wedding yet, I hate to be the one to break this to you… but weddings are stressful.

Which is a sad irony, because it’s supposed to be a very blissful time in your life!

So, squeezing all the stress and tension of a wedding in a meer 17 days can be EXTREMELY hazardous to your mental health… and maybe even your relationship.

That being said, my husband and I had to remind ourselves WHY we were doing this. Getting married is about celebrating and honoring the special devotion that Dakota and I have for one another.

We were about to stand in front of our loved ones and promise our undying love to each other- to support each other, to be true to each other, and to enter a sacred commitment to one another.


I get that dresses and appetizers and table cloth colors are a part of the deal, but the reason we were doing ANY of this, was to make those incredible vows to each other.

Dakota kept me grounded in the wedding prep, and reminded me of this. So even when things went wrong (Because, SURPRISE, they always do!) it didn’t matter!

And after going through it all, our ceremony was the most amazing experience. We both talked later about it, and decided we really didn’t care about the reception once we said our vows! We were content! The floor could have caved in, and we still would have been floating on that “just-married” feeling.

It doesn’t matter if you plan your wedding in two days or two years- don’t forget the reason you are having a wedding after all.

Because the flowers will eventually die, and people will forget what our cake tasted like, but our marriage is forever.


Ruth Lee







Welcome back to my blog!

I am SO SO SO excited to launch my first giveaway for you guys!

I am dubbing this my “Stay Gold Giveaway”; and there are a few meanings behind this!

More than anything, I am so grateful to each and every one of you who has supported my crazy journey- especially the last year through pregnancy and motherhood. Every comment, like, share, and personal message has meant the world to me!

Social Media amazes me at the ability we now have to connect to people all across the world- I hold dear every amazing person I have “met”, and every incredible story that has been shared with me.


I want to give back to you, so I put together a super fun STAY GOLD prize pack for one SPECIAL winner!


It includes:

1 Miss Spa 24K Gold Creme Mask (RV: $6.99)

1 JOICO K-Pak Color Therapy Luster Lock (RV: $4.99)

1 Anastasia Beverly Hills Lip Gloss in “Gilded” (RV: $16.00)

1 Tarte Tartiest Metallic Shadow in “Hussy” (RV: $14.00)

1 Makeup Revolution Strobe Highlighter in “Gold Addict” (RV: $6.00)*

These products are SO amazing! ❤ THE WINNER will also be announced on my multiple platforms, which is exposure to over 40k individuals! (woo hoo!)


you must comply with these simple steps:

1. Subscribe to the Ruth Lee YouTube Channel HERE!

2. Like the Ruth Lee Diary Facebook Page HERE!

3. Follow me on Instagram HERE!

after you are finished, you MUST comment “Done!” on THIS Instagram post!

***YOU ALSO can receive 1 additional entry for EVERY person you tag on the Instagram post- each in their own comment!***


Contest will end AUGUST 7TH!

Winner will be selected through a random generator and will be announced by August 9th! ❤

disclaimer:Per Social Media rules, I must mention this is in no way sponsored, administered, or associated with Instagram, Facebook, or YouTube. By entering, entrants confirm they are 13+ years of age, release Instagram of responsibility, and agree to Instagram’s term of use, and must live in North America. These products were purchased with my own money.

*= delivered this product to me broken (sad face), SO, I am in the process of filing a return with them. The winner will receive the same product or of equal or greater value.


Summer Glow Face Routine (& Free Foundation Brush!)

In case you missed it…

I started a new YouTube channel for the Ruth Lee Diary!

You can check out my first video HERE!

In this blog post, I am going to go a little more into detail on this video!

And if you’re ready to get your FREE Mieoko Kabuki Brush (A $24 value! Just pay shipping!) Click HERE!

Step One: Fresh Face

It makes sense, right? You want to have the best possible canvas for your make-up. There is no sense in spending money on quality make-up products, if you abuse your skin! This year, one of my goals was to really focus on baby-ing my skin.

I really recommend the brand OleHenriksen for skin products! If you’re not sure where to start, look into the Three Little Wonders set here.

It includes:

– 1 oz/ 30 mL Truth Serum
– 1 oz/ 30 mL Sheer Transformation Perfecting Moisturizer
– 1 oz/ 30 mL Invigorating Night Transformation Gel

Together, I noticed a HUGE difference in my skin’s brightness, firmness, and smoothness! I also adore the Power Peel system from OleHenriksen if you are looking for an at-home facial with impressive results!

And, the obvious but often forgotten: don’t sleep in your make-up.

Listen, I hear you. I used to be, unfortunately, notorious at breaking this rule. I try and keep a pack of facial wipes near my nightstand in case of emergencies! In worst case scenarios, this is by far better than nothing!

OK, now that we have the basics down, let’s continue!


Step Two: Foundation

In this particular video, I am using Laura Mercier Flawless Fusion Ultra-Longwear Foundation.

TIP: If you notice, the color is quite a bit different than my face’s skin color in the video. That is because… I spray tan. When you spray tan, your face is often the first place that your tan fades from! I like to keep several shades on hand, because honestly, I never know what color is going to match best! This shade is really tan, but it best matched my freshly-sprayed body. And even for people who naturally get more tan in the Summer, your foundation shade will change!

As I say in the video, I like to apply the foundation on my face in five spots- on my forehead, on my chin, on each cheek, and on my nose. A little goes a long way; especially if you have a quality foundation AND foundation brush. I always like to find cheaper make-up products when I can, however, foundation is one that I think is OK to splurge on.

Make-up brushes- now those can get expensive! In my personal collection, I have a varying degree of costs for my brushes! If you’ve looked, then you know. It can get ridiculous! So, I am here to ease the burden of the insanity!


I saw an ad for a Free Kabuki brush (just pay shipping) and I figured it was worth a shot! I paid a few dollars, and to my great surprise, I received my brush a couple of days later!

It’s called the Mieoko Kabuki Brush, and at the time I am writing this blog, you can get yours for FREE as well, click here!!


I am not sure how long this will go on, so I would probably recommend doing this sooner than later!

Anyways, I was really surprised by the quality of this brush. It is a flat-top brush with really high density bristles. This is perfect for medium to heavy coverage- and with the right application, you will get really pretty, flawless and EVEN coverage!

In the video you will be able to see how I “buff” the foundation- these means using really precise and circular motions of the brush to blend the foundation into my skin.


Step Three: Cream Contour

For the past few months, I have been falling in love with the Graftobian HD Glamour Creme Super Palette in Cool. This has a pretty hefty price tag, but for good reason. I have yet to encounter another creme palette that has such an incredible combination of blendability and pigmentation. If you are a MUA, you need this! I actually found out they use this exact palette on TV and Movie sets, and I can see why. If you can’t fork out the money for the whole palette, they also have smaller palettes on their website! Again, I really love to find drugstore products, but if you are looking for a quality and lasting product for your make-up kit, here you go!

In the video, I showed you where I put my light shades for the contour (I use the lightest shade in my kit, buff)- Under my eyes, on my forehead, on my chin, the bridge of my nose, and a little on my upper lip.

To apply this particular formula, I prefer to use my fingers. It is just really precise, and the warmth of your fingertips will allow a really smooth transition from palette to face. Then, I blend it with the Mieoko Kabuki Brush. (I love this brush for blending my contour!)

For the dark shades, I use a combination of Butterscotch and Auburn. I apply this on the outside of my forehead, my cheek bones, on each side of the bridge of my nose, and a little to accent my chin.

LOCK that contour in with some of favorite magic powder- Laura Mercier Translucent Setting Powder. You can’t go wrong with this stuff, folks! It leaves your skin matte and perfected. By the way, this formula is flashback free, which means your selfies will not suffer!


Step Four: DRAMA

To amp up the contour, and also assist in a more seamless look, I have a few tips. I apply bronzer as you normally would- accenting the places on your face where the sun would naturally shine on you. Your cheeks, nose, forehead. I use Urban Decay’s Beached Bronzer. This is a really nice shade, and doesn’t have any glitter or shine to it.

I also like to touch up with a little powder contour. Que one of my favorite drugstore products- e.l.f. contour palette. I love this because we are just accenting the creme contour, so you really don’t need to over-do it with an expensive powder palette. This one works beautifully for me! Just lightly go over the dark contour that you did previously with the creme palette!



I can’t even begin to express how the act of highlighting my face has genuinely changed my life. For real! I go from tired, flat, yaaaawn momma to unicorn-fairy-princess momma!

The beauty of highlight is that you are allowed to go as natural or as YAS-QUEEN as you want! So, don’t be afraid!

I show you my love of Marc Jacob’s Coconut Dew Drops Gel Highlight in my video. I have also swatched this on my Instagram if you need to see how dreamy it is! You can achieve the most natural of glows with this product, or build it up for more glow! It is a breeze to blend! Oh, and yes, it smells like heavenly coconut. Need I say more?

Also, where you choose to highlight is totally up to you! The tops of your cheeks are pretty key! I also like to dust the bridge of my nose, a little on my forehead, and again, a little on my upper lip!

OK and real talk, if I was left on a deserted island and had only one make-up item with me, I would choose Diorskin Nude Air Luminizing Powder.

I am 100% in love with this product. I can’t express how passionately I feel about this. It is the epitome of perfection. If words like: radiant, luminous, iridescent, and glowing are how you want to describe your face- BUY THIS. NOW. I top off my highlight with this and that’s it. There’s nothing else you could add to your face to top this. You’re done!

This is definitely not my “every-day” face routine, but if you want a really pretty, glowy, and contoured look for the Summer- this is it.

If you pretties have any questions, ASK ME!

Thank you so much for supporting me and my blog and NOW my YouTube Channel! ❤


Ruth Lee





I Was Robbed.

I was robbed.

Money was not taken, nor materialistic things. And it was not a human that stole from me.

But, I was robbed.

My happiness, my motivation, the early days with my new baby, my relationship, my energy, my feelings of safety.

According to the Centers for Disease Control, 11-20% of women who give birth each year have postpartum depression. That means, in the United States alone, there are about 600,000 new women each year who struggle with this.

In fact, more women will suffer from postpartum depression and related illnesses in a year than the COMBINED new cases for men and women of tuberculosis, leukemia, multiple sclerosis, Parkinson’s, Alzheimer’s, lupus, and epilepsy.

Oh, and by the way, these statistics are based purely on reported cases, and we all know there are far more unreported.

And yet, there is still such a heavy stigma of shame and unacceptable. WHY?

And what’s worse, only about 15% of women with postpartum depression ever receive professional help.

Here’s why this matters. Research shows that women who remain untreated for PPD are less able to bond with their children, let alone care for themselves. They are prone to “self-medicate” with alcohol or drugs. And, they may end up with lifelong chronic depression or anxiety. And by the way, this isn’t just affecting these women. It’s affecting their families, too.

Here’s the reality. When I found out I was pregnant, the absolute furthest thing from my mind was learning about PPD. No one I personally knew had ever talked about this with me. I never knew anyone who experienced this (or so I thought).

I know it’s a broken record, but for those who may not know, I will give you a little background. My pregnancy was a complete surprise. And although the situation wasn’t “ideal”, I was very, VERY blessed to have been surrounded with love and support. I also had an incredible man by my side, and easily our daughter is the best thing that could have happened to us.

I loved my pregnancy. People often talk about their love of the 2nd Trimester, and I fully support that. I felt so beautiful! I loved having a bump, and feeling my baby move. I was also mentally AMAZING. My relationship with my husband had never been stronger. I worked THREE jobs, and completed a semester of University. I created a nursery, kept a clean house, and read baby books constantly. I also got engaged, planned a wedding, and got married when I was 8.5 months pregnant! I love the person I was when I was pregnant. Of course, it wasn’t all easy, and the last few weeks of my pregnancy seemed like a lifetime, but it’s true what they say. You blink, and it’s over.


Going in to my labor, I really had worked on trusting my body. Saying and thinking positive mantras. Believing that I could bring my baby here safely. I researched a lot of information, dragged my husband to classes, and using natural supplements to “prime” my body for labor. I was young and healthy, my baby was healthy, I felt empowered. I felt strong.

That all shattered when the nurses told me that my baby’s heart rate was dropping when we arrived at the hospital. I felt betrayed by my own body. I honestly felt that the baby I loved and had cared for these past nine months could now die while entrapped inside me; I was terrified. I was sent into L&D and placed on Pitocin immediately.

You’ve probably heard this story from me already, so I’ll skip to the end. After almost laboring for close to 24 hours, I ended up with a C-Section. I believe that I never dilated past a seven and a half, and my baby was essentially in the pushing position, so she was stuck. And my body failed me. Well, that’s how I saw it, anyways.

Unless you’ve been through it yourself, I think a lot of people are unable to truly sympathize with the feelings surrounding this circumstance. But, a lot of women go through it. A lot of women face a C-Section and have difficult feelings towards it. And that’s why I talk about it. Because, when you are going through it, you feel very, very alone. It’s hard to end up with a perfect baby and somehow have feelings of trauma and sadness. There are plenty of women who lose their babies, so how ungrateful of you to feel this way. In all honesty, you are allowed to feel however you feel. And those around you should learn to accept that and understand. But, also, you need to understand that it is hard for your loved ones to know what to say or do. I’ll touch on that a bit later.

My husband got a new job right before the birth of our daughter, which was a great opportunity, and I was so proud of him. However, it required a lot of hours and he essentially had one day off of work after I had my daughter. I was in the hospital for four days.


Most probably aren’t super familiar with what happens during a C-Section, so I’ll brief you on it. Your arms are stretched out on boards so that your veins are easily accessible. They stretch a blue cloth up right past your shoulders. The operating room is purposely kept extremely cold- to keep the doctors and nurses from sweating and reduce the risk of sweat contaminating the operative field. I remember being insanely cold during my operation. They piled layers of blankets on me, but it didn’t really do anything. I shook the entire time.

Once an incision is made into the first layer of your skin, the doctor cuts through all the layers of fat and then through a thick layer called the fascia. Then, another layer is cut called the peritoneum, this is the sac that holds all your organs. Your bladder sits right on top of the uterus, and has to be moved so that the doctor can cut into the uterus. Once the doctor has a clear view of the uterus, it is cut into and the amniotic sac is ruptured. From here, the baby can be pulled out and is officially born! At this time, most moms are able to hold and meet their baby, and get to be carried away together after Mom gets stitched up. Because my baby and labor had so many complications, she was immediately taken into the NICU before I got to hold her. She had to get her lungs sucked out, and checked out by the specialist team. Again, this was really hard for me to process later on.

The reason I am telling you all this, is really to educate others. Cesareans are a major surgery, as you can probably comprehend by how many internal incision are made and later sewn up. In my case, my recovery was particularly difficult because my body had labored for so long before my surgery. The first few days were really, really hard. Even with the best medicine in the world, I was in immense amounts of pain. I remained in bed the majority of my stay in the hospital. Even sitting up literally made me feel like my incision would burst open in searing pain. Anytime I wanted to hold my baby, I had to ask someone to help me. I couldn’t stand up and change her diapers. There were 24 hours in which she had to remain in an incubator for Jaundice. And on top of that, my husband did have to leave us for work. I hope with me sharing this, maybe you can understand where my feelings stand.

Coming home was hard, too. Like I said, my husband had to work, so I was left alone sometimes for 12 hours or more a day. It took me AT LEAST six weeks to feel somewhat normal again- as in being able to walk or sit up without pain. I also couldn’t drive during this time. So, I developed a lot of emotions during this period. My baby, in all honesty, was perfect. She was such a good baby. And I definitely developed a bond with her. However, it was a lot different than I imagined. It was a lot harder than I imagined. A lot of days, the most I could do was simply keep us two alive. I think probably the first week I survived on nothing more than protein shakes. It was tough.

One of the biggest points I want to make here, is that I didn’t know how to ask for help. And from here, my PPD really developed. And I knew it was bad because it got worse even after I physically healed. I remember previously just wishing for the day that I could walk and take care of my baby. And then, oddly enough, I was physically healed, but my mentality was broken.

A lot of people think PPD, or depression in general, is just someone crying a lot or feeling sad. I honestly never really knew what it was… Until it was happening to me.

The biggest emotions I experienced were an utter lack of motivation for anything. I woke up, took care of the baby, and when she slept, I laid in bed. (But rarely slept). I didn’t take care of myself. Most days I didn’t shower and my eating was really, really rare. I had a lot of postpartum bleeding, and had to stay in diapers for over four weeks. People would call me or text me and I would ignore it.  Our house was a disaster. My husband would come home from a long, long day at work, and we would have no food. I developed a serious anxiety about leaving the house. I was terrified of even going to the grocery store. It was really hard on my husband to see me like this, and he really couldn’t understand why it was happening. And I, I couldn’t explain it.

I mean, it sounds so simple. I would sit there often and be so confused about why I felt this way. I mean, I could just snap out of it? Force my way through this? And I tried, I tried to “bring myself out of it”, but you guys, what I didn’t know, is that you can’t. Because I sought a lot of answers on this, I have spent a lot of time researching this topic. I want to share something with you. And I wish, I wish SO bad that someone would have shared this with me.


You guys, I have researched and found many, many images similar to the one above. And they all share the same thing. Depression, true, prolonged depression (also referred to as MDD or major depressive disorder) is an actual brain disease. And please note, this is different than being upset about something in your day or feeling disappointed about something.

Depression affects three major areas of the brain- the hippocampus, amygdala, and prefrontal cortex. I won’t go in-depth here, but essentially issues here lead to disturbed sleep and activities, irregular hormones and chemicals in your body, negative effects on your emotional responses, decision making issues, memory problems… it goes on.

I hear so many moms realize they may be dealing with PPD (or anyone with depression), and still be so afraid to say anything to their doctors or even talk about it with their loved ones. It is the equivalent (literally) of having a brain disorder, and feeling that it’s your fault, and that you can just “snap out of it”.

And that adds to the difficulty of living with a mental disorder. You don’t understand it. You can’t fix it on your own. It’s hard to explain it to those around you. You feel immense amounts of guilt about it. It is constant. You can’t call your boss and say, “Hey, my depression and anxiety are really bad today and I can’t make it into work.”

If you’re dealing with depression, or someone you love is, or you simply want to understand, I highly recommend watching the TED talk by Kevin Breel. He. Is. Amazing. Check this out. I will quote this part because he expresses this idea so perfectly,

 “That’s the stigma, because, unfortunately, we live in a world where if you break your arm, everyone runs over to sign your cast, but if you tell people you’re depressed, everyone runs the other way. That’s the stigma. We are so, so, so accepting of any body part breaking down, other than our brains. And that’s ignorance. That’s pure ignorance. And that ignorance has created a world that doesn’t understand depression, that doesn’t understand mental health. And that’s ironic to me because depression is one of the best-documented problems we have in the world, yet it’s one of the least discussed.”

You guys, I was robbed.

I wasted a lot of days in the beginning of my baby’s life not truly being the woman and mother that I can be. I spent a lot of time just wasting hours in bed. I spent a lot of time living in fear. I spent a lot of time avoiding others. And I also spent a lot of time blaming myself, or avoiding treatment. I have spent a lot of time feeling hopelessly alone, and not understanding why.

And if you personally have never gone through this, I am tremendously happy for you. Seriously. Because it is incredibly terrible and life-wrecking, and hard on you and those around you. But I beg, if you haven’t gone through it, please be sensitive to those that have/are.

I saw this on Pinterest, and knew that I needed to add it to this blog post. It is so, SO important.


It’s a cruel injustice that when you are suffering, you feel alone, and overall this resorts to those around you avoiding you even more. If you think someone around you is dealing with this, be accepting of their feelings and give them gentle opportunities to open up to you.

PPD is not a choice. So, do not talk to someone as if it is. As if someone would choose to endure the misery that is depression. It’s all too often that we may hear, “You have so many great things in life! Why would you be depressed?” And that certainly does more harm than good. It creates blame and increases guilt on this individual, which, you guessed it, is not going to help ANYONE with depression.

Someone with depression doesn’t need shame or to be told that they are weak. No one really understands what someone else is going through. Two individuals could go through very similar events, and end up with very different mentalities or life changes. Because you were able to conquer life’s challenges without developing a serious form of depression (again, seriously, that is amazing and we are all happy for you) does not give you permission to put down anyone who is different.


I personally felt a lot of shame and guilt once I had taken my SSRI’s for a few months. I mean, I was 6 months PP. I’m sure I should be “over” it, right? I didn’t really talk about it with anyone, because, again, #Stigma. So, I just decided one day that I wouldn’t continue my SSRI treatment. I was “fine”.

Please, please, please don’t do what I did. What followed, unknowingly, easily led to one of the most difficult times in my Postpartum journey. My relationship struggled. My energy was entirely gone. My motivation to do most things had zeroed out. I retreated to ignoring people once again, and wishing I could just lock the door in my room and never come out. My relationship with my child suffered. Again, I was robbed. But this time, I should have known better.

I am seven and a half months postpartum and I am still seeking treatment for my depression and anxiety. That may make some of you embarrassed for me or make you feel uncomfortable, but, it’s the truth. Postpartum depression does not have an expiration date. I also know many women who don’t really develop it until several months or even a year after they gave birth. Pay attention to your body. And not only that, but be accepting if you know that you need help.

Being aware and educated in my own struggles has brought me a great amount of peace and also sympathy towards others. I really, truly wish that this article helps even one person. If that’s with seeking treatment for yourself, helping someone you love, or simply being aware.

J.K. Rowling said it best, “I have never been remotely ashamed of having been depressed. Never. What’s there to be ashamed of? I went through a really hard tough time and I’m quite proud I got out of that.”

Thanks for reading this novel. If you have any questions or need someone to listen, you can always DM me on my Instagram @baybayruth (I try my best to read everything!) If you are suffering with this, please, please know that you absolutely not alone.

Much love,


Southern Utah Staycation

It’s fun to tell people that we live in Utah when we are traveling, because they always ask questions about snow. They immediately picture beautiful snow-capped mountains, and ask us how often we ski.

Then, we get to explain that we live in Southern Utah, where it is quite different than they might imagine.

We love living in Saint George, and even after living here for close to seven years, I am still amazed at how much I have yet to discover. It’s a place of natural beauty and adventure, with a plethora of exciting outdoor activities. If you’re curious on what there is to do where I live, click Here.

And while we do truly enjoy where we live, my husband and I also have a love of travel. However, now that we are parents of a six-month old baby, there is a lot more work to be done in regards to what to bring, where to go, and how far we can go!

This, of course, spurred the idea of a staycation- to take a vacation in the exact city that we already love and live in.

And although we have traveled to many diverse and beautiful places, I think this trip was one of the most relaxing, carefree, and still extremely memorable trips we have taken. However, if you don’t live in Saint George, I highly recommend looking into visiting! I also recommend the idea of a staycation; especially those with young children. It can be time spent within your own city, or even time just spent at your house! Here is a great article with tips on vacationing right in your own home.

That being said, the best decision that we made, was to stay at The Inn At Entrada.


The Inn is very different than any resort I have stayed at before. Instead of imagining a hotel resort with rooms stacked right on top of one another, this beautiful place boasts a variety of private suites and casitas spread out next to the allusive Entrada at Snow Canyon Country Club. As a guest of the Inn, you are allowed access to the private facilities, including their gorgeous golf course, restaurant, fitness center, and pool.

(Yes, the famous pool. You know, the one featured on High School Musical 2? Yep, the film was shot here and the actors did indeed stay at the Inn during filming!)


We had the pleasure of staying in what is called an Anasazi 2-Bedroom Suite. If you’re interested in more details or on booking it for yourself, click Here.

It is a two bedroom, two bathroom luxurious suite, that features ample living space.

The full-size kitchen is absolutely gorgeous- and fully stocked with kitchen supplies- you don’t need to (and won’t want to) get your morning coffee elsewhere. The Inn provides you with a great selection to brew right in your own kitchen.



I love that there is such incredible natural light throughout the suite. You can see the large windows and skylights in the kitchen! *sigh*


We wanted to give my readers an accurate feel to how large the kitchen actually is, so here you have it! More than enough to dance in! 🙂


If you make it out of this dream kitchen, surely it will largely be due to the inviting fireplace in the living room. Above that is a large TV, if you feel obliged to look at anything other than the amazing scenery outside.



I am telling you, you will feel at home in this suite. In fact, my little fam decided we liked it here better than our own home, and tried to come up with schemes in hopes to never leave The Inn.


There was something so sweet about being able to read to our baby in total comfort and quiet during our stay. It is one of our favorite things to do, and the Inn provided a perfect space to do it in!




Traveling with a baby can be nerve-wrecking for multiple reasons, as you want your baby to be as comfortable as possible. We had more than enough room for her toys and books. There even was a closet with a full-size washer and dryer! Which, as all new parents know, is an absolute dream while traveling.

As someone who enjoys hotels and travelling, I have endured my fair-share of bad hotel beds. Who hasn’t? Even a lot of the higher-end resorts have led me to disappointment in this category.  I think some of the time, we as guests just cross our fingers and hope for the best. I am happy and confident to report that the beds at Entrada were beyond luxurious and comfortable. You can tell the linens are high-quality and well looked after. And, as you might expect, the room was beautiful. I haven’t mentioned yet, but the Inn features “Smart House” technology. As in, you click a button on a remote and your blinds descend from the ceiling. We decided that this is a “must” in our future home… One day! 🙂




The bathroom connected to our Master bedroom couldn’t have been any better. It was immaculately clean and bright. There was: a large, walk-in closet, a large, walk-in shower, a beautiful vanity with two sinks, and my favorite- a whirlpool tub.

I think that may have been Presley’s favorite as well.




Yes, she absolutely adores her otteroo! You can get one for your little one, here.


So, yes, the suite absolutely was incredible. And this trip, we craved relaxation more than adventure. So, while Saint George is the perfect place for exploring nature and pushing your physical limits, we decided to take it easy and enjoy what the Inn at Entrada had for us.


There is plenty to enjoy just within the grounds of the resort. We love walks as a family, and there was quite a lot to look at! The Inn has beautiful ponds, basketball courts, volleyball courts, pickleball courts, waterfalls, bridges, etc. It is such a pretty area!




There are also a few little friends that live here! We saw a bunch of ducks, bunnies, and frogs!




We relaxed by the pool, and I succesfully managed to refrain belting High School Musical songs aloud, which I am very proud of. We also participated in a friendly game of pool-side ping-pong.



There a few dining options on location, as well as Downtown St. George being fairly close by.

We ordered pizza to our room one night, grabbed some take out another. However for lunch, my husband ran by the “Snack bar” at Entrada, which is the most casual dining option that is offered there.

Normally, I wouldn’t report on this.

And to be honest, I wasn’t expecting much. However, to this day, those are still the absolute best chicken strips and fries that I have ever had. I still dream about them. That’s all I have to say on that.

To burn some of those delicious calories off, we could have hit the Entrada Fitness Center, which again we had free access to. However, we decided to switch gears, literally, and go for a bike ride.


Biking through Entrada was so much fun! It is such a beautiful community! We absolutely loved it!

As a guest of the Inn, you also have access to the private golf course at Entrada.The Johnny Miller Signature Design 18-hole championship private golf course weaves through ancient black lava flows and meandering streams, stretching across 7,085 yards.  Entrada distinguishes itself year after year as Utah’s premier golf experience. Entrada is ranked as the number one year-round golf course in the state by Golf Digest Magazine.

We weren’t able to golf this time around, but it is on our list!

With so many amazing options just within Entrada, we didn’t even have to leave the gated community to have an amazing time.

The Inn at Entrada is much more than a place to stay. They take a step above in everything that they offer there. The accomodations were so incredible!

I am not kidding when I say that we were sad to leave.

I highly recommend the Inn to anyone and everyone, as they have accomodations for just one person, up to a 5-bedroom Suite!

Feel free to let me know if you have any questions, or if you know of any other hidden gem resorts that we need to see next!

The gorgeous lifestyle photography was done by Ashley Meagan Photography